Lights.

In you is the light of a thousand suns.
But every day the sun sets. Lights burn out.
A candle doesn’t stand a chance against a cool breeze.
Christmas lights always come down.
& even the brightest star doesn’t burn forever.

At the hands of another – the quick flip of a switch can turn everything black.
You walk with such grace.
Outsiders call you love.
They call you fierce.
They call you unstoppable.
They call you inspiring.
They call you light.
But when you look in the mirror the only light you can find is the smallest bead.
Right where your heart is.
It still emits warmth.
Just enough to keep you from freezing.
They left you out in the cold.
& they get mad when you try to keep yourself warm.
You can see your own breath as it leaves your body.
You’re gasping for air.
It’s dark.
You are grasping for the walls just to find your way.
You sacrificed your freedom just to get someone to see you.
But now you can’t see yourself.
You splash water on your face, rubbing your eyes.
Why can’t I see my reflection?
You run your finger tips over your cheek bones.
And across your lips.
And you place your hand on the burning ember that is your heart.
You can feel your heart beating.
Slow and steady.
You are still alive.

Sweet girl.
REACH OVER AND TURN THE LIGHT ON.
The switch is right there.
Beside you.
On the wall.
You are not stuck.
You are not trapped.
You are not broken.
You have been tricked.
Tricked into thinking the switch no longer works.
They told you it is faulty.
That it needs re-wiring.
They told you it would take years for it to ever work the way it should.
They lied.
Can’t you see that.
They lied to you.
Telling you that you’re broken.
Un-fixable.
Needy.
Too sensitive.
Incompetent.
Dumb.
Too loving.
These words.
These lies – they burn like fire.

You struggle to flip the switch.
Banging your hand against the wall.
Almost as if you are afraid to let the light in.
You yell, “MY HEART ACHE IS GOING TO LEAVE WITH YOU!”
You don’t decide who I am.
Your opinion of me is irrelevant.
The monsters in your head have nothing to do with me.
Leave me alone.
Set me free.
I am enough.
I am enough.
I am enough.

Flip….

It is so bright.
It takes a minute for your eyes to adjust.
You see the outline of a beautiful woman staring back at you.
Her hair.
Her light brown, golden eyes.
All her features begin to come into focus.
“She is gorgeous!” You say to yourself.
Who is she?
& where has she been?

Dedicated to a special woman in my life, who just needs to turn the light on.

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